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Reuniting a couple after a relationship breakup does not bring happiness to the partners

 
, medical expert
Last reviewed: 01.07.2025
 
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24 February 2012, 18:40

Reuniting a couple after a breakup does not bring happiness to the partners and most often ends in a new breakup, American scientists say.

According to the study's author, Amber Vennum, a professor at Kansas State University, there are "cyclical" couples. They break up, then get back together, and this can go on for years. Incidentally, such cases are quite common. According to scientists, about 40% of people over 20 have relationships with partners with whom they have already broken up once.

Amber Vennum and her colleagues conducted a study involving "cyclic" and "non-cyclic" couples. The lovers were asked about their relationships, the qualities of their partners, and their plans for the future.

It turned out that reunification after a breakup is associated with relationship problems. Cyclical couples are usually more impulsive in making important decisions, such as living together, having more children, or moving. They are not inclined to dialogue, compromise, and often make decisions that offend their loved ones. This lowers self-esteem and causes dissatisfaction with the partner. Therefore, representatives of "cyclical" couples speak less confidently about their future together than "non-cyclical" ones.

In addition, it turned out that if a "cyclic" couple gets married, they have more conflicts and are not as happy as those who have not separated before. Moreover, over time, these couples become disillusioned with family life. They are more likely to get divorced during the first three years of marriage.

According to the author of the study, the "cyclicality" in relationships does not go away. If people broke up and got back together as a couple, they behave the same way when they get married. This state worsens the relationship, people are less and less confident in their future together. They do not try to strengthen the relationship and restore mutual understanding, since they do not feel obligated to their partner. This is how a vicious circle arises, which ultimately leads to a breakup.

So, the authors of the study believe that once you break up, you shouldn't renew the relationship. Usually, it doesn't lead to anything good. But if you decide to get back together, make sure that it's a common, balanced decision. It's necessary to make an effort to establish mutual understanding, make the relationship strong and trusting. After all, psychologists are sure that problems on the personal front have a negative impact on absolutely all aspects of our lives.

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