Sex partners with a big age difference

This plot is considered piquant, although it should be recognized as typical. In any case, not rare. It is not for nothing that it is so beloved by the literature of all countries and times. However, the repetition of the plot does not reduce the number of complexes, doubts and misinterpretations. Therefore, let's try to answer this question: what are the characteristics of sex between partners with a significant age difference?

First, let's immediately discard cases where the basis of age misalliance is the material interest of one of the parties. Sex for money is the lot of professionals, and we will not delve into the secrets of their craft. Let's talk about those who are overcome by a sincere and mutual desire to extend the resulting closeness to the sexual sphere.

Unfortunately, there are a number of stereotypes in society regarding sex in, let's say, a very mature age. It is believed that older people cannot and should not have sexual desires, and even if they do, there is no way to fulfill them: sex in old age is supposedly harmful to health; an old body is physically unattractive and therefore cannot be desired; an older person's focus on sex is shameful; "lust for young flesh" is downright shameful - and so on.

First of all, let us note that ajism (from age) is one of the forms of discrimination, meaning a dismissive attitude towards old people, denying them the right to experience any desires that seem "indecent at this age" to young people. In fact, sexuality is a property of the human body, and therefore it is born and dies with it. The Valencia Declaration of Sexual Rights, adopted in 1997 by the XIII World Sexological Congress, in particular, manifests the following: "Sexuality is present throughout the life cycle, harmonizing the personality, creating and strengthening interpersonal relationships." Age is an individual characteristic, you can be indifferent to sex at thirty and, on the contrary, remain an ardent lover until seventy. After all, love, as we know, is a magical power and is able to compensate for age-related changes. And a loving eye will forgive a lot.

However, love not only works wonders, but also dictates certain responsibilities. In an elderly couple, as a rule, an attitude to sex is formed as the fulfillment of a marital duty, it ceases to be an important part of life, retreats before a simple habit, affection for each other. Having sex with a partner much younger than yourself, on the contrary, requires special attention and special efforts. You need to take care of yourself, take care of your body, spend time on it, and finally train. You should not be afraid to look like a "young old woman" - after all, this is what you can call an elderly woman who resorts to vulgar immoderate makeup, but does not do gymnastics. Agree, it is unlikely that anyone would think of calling many movie stars in their seventh decade old women.

Unfortunately, there is a double standard of aging in society. It is commonly believed that a man can win with his intellect, experience, etc. For women, the most important thing is their appearance, and that is why they become old immediately after they stop being young. In the West, these ideas are the subject of a fair fight by feminists, but here, overcoming such stereotypes is probably a matter of time.

Now let's see what happens to the human body during aging.

In women during menopause, in postmenopause, due to a decrease in the level of estrogens in the blood, the blood supply to the vagina decreases, which leads to a decrease in vaginal lubrication (moisturization). At the same time, the elasticity of the vaginal walls decreases. These natural changes can be compensated for by using drugs containing estrogens or artificial lubricants. In addition, there is a special set of exercises developed by the gynecologist Kegel to maintain the tone of the muscles of the vagina, perineum, and, by the way, the penis. Masters and Johnson cite data showing that an active sex life in postmenopause serves as the best protection against aging of the genitals, since it helps to create a favorable hormonal background.

At the same time, the sensitivity of the clitoris during menopause and after its completion does not change in any way, the ability to experience orgasm is preserved until 50-60 years, and according to some data, even later. Age does not affect the choice and range of sexual positions. The only thing is that a young and passionate partner should remember these changes in the woman's body and conduct sexual intercourse more carefully so as not to damage the mucous membrane.

The peak of male sexual activity, as is known, falls at 25-28 years. After forty, sexual function begins to gradually fade. After 55, as a rule (although it should be noted that the time frame is very individual), the strength of erection and the speed of its occurrence decrease, the intensity of ejaculation and the amount of ejaculate decrease, the refractory period, that is, the interval between two ejaculations, increases. Muscle tension during sexual intercourse also decreases. At the same time, the ability of sperm to fertilize is preserved until old age, which a young partner who has not lost fertility should remember and not neglect measures to protect against unwanted pregnancy.

Of aging men, only 5% experience the so-called male menopause; the unpleasant physiological sensations of this period are relieved by the introduction of testosterone, the natural level of which decreases with age. At the same time, only a third of men after 60 consider themselves impotent. It is useful for the remaining two thirds who continue their sexual life to know that at this age they should not strive for ejaculation at all costs, and partners should not take its absence as evidence of "poor quality" sex.

Generally speaking, if a person has not lived in vain, with age he gains experience, including sexual experience. The well-known joke: "As long as I have a finger and a tongue, I will not be impotent" is absolutely true. Indeed, an experienced man will be able to give his partner pleasure with a finger, tongue and other methods that do not require a youthful reinforced concrete erection.

At the same time, a young girl, of course, should not expect and demand from an older partner the same strength of erotic manifestations. At the beginning of the affair, an older man usually appears more sexually active, then a natural fading of physiological reactions occurs, and not cooling at all.

It is not for nothing that orgasm is called "little death" in some countries. Another joke about "the best death for a man" is also widespread. In fact, few people have ever managed to die during sexual intercourse, since this requires so-called somatic burden. Usually, a person in a pre-infarction or pre-stroke condition avoids stress, including sexual stress. For older women, according to the same Masters and Johnson, sex is practically safe.

As for stimulants, choosing an erector and any doubts and worries in general - of course, you need to contact a specialist. Boldly and without any embarrassment.

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