Reuniting a couple after a break in relationships does not bring partners happiness
Last reviewed: 23.04.2024
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The reunion of the couple after parting does not bring partners happiness and more often ends in a new gap, say US scientists.
According to the author of the study, Amber Vennum (Amber Vennum), a professor at the University of Kansas (Kansas State University), there are "cyclical" couples. They break off the relationship, then re-reunite, and this can continue for many years. By the way, such cases are quite common. According to scientists, about 40% of people over 20 years old have relationships with partners with whom they once parted.
Amber Vennum and her colleagues conducted a study involving "cyclic" and "non-cyclic" pairs. Lovers were asked about their relationship, the qualities of their partners, their plans for the future.
It turned out that reunion after parting is associated with problems in the relationship. Cyclical couples are usually more impulsive in making important decisions, for example, on cohabitation, family reunification, relocation. They are not inclined to dialogue, compromise, often make decisions that offend their loved ones. Because of this, self-esteem is lowered, there is dissatisfaction with the partner. Therefore representatives of "cyclic" couples speak less confidently of a joint future than "noncyclic" ones.
In addition, it turned out that if the "cyclic" couple marries, then they have conflicts more often and they are not as happy as those who did not leave before. Moreover, over time, these couples were disappointed in family life. They often had divorces during the first three years of marriage.
According to the author of the study, "cyclicity" in the relationship does not go anywhere. If people parted and came together as a couple, they behave the same way and got married. This state worsens the relationship, people are less confident in the future together. They do not try to strengthen relations and return mutual understanding, as they do not feel obligated to the partner. This creates a vicious circle, which eventually leads to parting.
So, the authors of the study believe that once parted, it is not worth renewing the relationship. Usually this does not lead to anything good. But if you still decide to be together again, make sure that this is a general balanced decision. It is necessary to make efforts to establish mutual understanding, to make relations strong and trusting. After all, psychologists are sure: problems on the personal front are negatively reflected absolutely on all aspects of our life.